Whether you were a Remainer or a Brexiteer, it’s fair to say that the referendum (and, moreover, its aftermath) has given the nation a significantly greater density of politics that one might usually expect from the last few weeks – a concentration of back-stab and counter back-stab that will no doubt send echoes long into the future.
As such, it’s not unreasonable to seek a balm from all the political machinations by indulging in a little of what the mainstream media traditionally like to describe as silly season – that summer period when nothing much happens, allowing unusual news items to surface.
In this spirit, we present our Zupplychain Midsummer Logistics Awards, a compilation of records, misdeeds and achievements across the Logistics and Supply Chain world.
To give you fair warning: the categories are arbitrary, the winners subjective and the whole exercise is, well, a bit silly; nevertheless, we hope it diverts and entertains for a few minutes at least – before you are returned to your scheduled programming.
Since Zupplychain are in the business of warehouse storage solutions, let’s first cast our eye over the biggest warehouses in the world.
Up until relatively recently, Constellation Europe in Bristol was easily the UK’s biggest warehouse (and given that it stored between 10 and 15% of the country’s alcohol at any one time, arguably the most loved!).
In recent years, the distribution networks of the major supermarket chains have superseded this - with Morrisons and Tesco vying for the crown - but all of these are dwarfed by the rise of the internet giants.
Amazon’s fulfilment centre in Dunfermline and the Shop Direct Group’s warehouse in Manchester are both over 1 million square feet.
However, as usual, America has to go one better – or at least bigger and the Target Import warehouse, in Washington comes in at over 2 million square feet!
And that’s ignoring the Boeing Everett Factory - which, whilst technically a warehouse of sorts, doesn’t exactly do a lot of pick and pack!
Biggest Cargo Ship
Obviously, when it comes to shipping, size matters. So, ensure you’ve got your monitor in widescreen mode for this section.
2016 saw the Benjamin Franklin break an All-comers record when it became the largest container ship to dock in the USA (at the port of Los Angeles).
However, that behemoth is barely in the top ten!
It’s edged down the Monster Ship rankings by a number of other Ultra Containers - most significantly a whole family of Triple E-Class ships owned and managed by Ap Moller Maersk, which includes the Magleby Maersk.
Then again, when you’re talking about cargo ships that are longer than the Empire State Building, who’s going to moan about the odd metre or two?! To get a real taste for these modern day Krakens, here’s a rundown of the big guns that roam the seas:
Quickest Pick & Pack
This one is probably quicker:
But this woman is somehow so terrifying, we can’t countenance not award the prize to her:
Longest Truck Trailer
We could cheat here and opt for an Argentinian or Australian road train – you know, those long combination vehicles like this one:
However, we’re going to stay within the realms of normality here (just for a moment) and choose a standard load. Well, to be fair, it’s far from standard but we think you know what we mean.
Here’s a Siemens wind turbine measuring in a 75 metres. Fancy doing a three point turn with that?
Of course, if you want more, we can give you more .
If you’re like me, you’ll sometimes find yourself inadvertently glued to World’s Toughest Truckers and Ice Truckers, gawping at the madness (see below for more on this). However, I’m not going to choose an obvious one here. Instead, our choice for worst trucking journey is supplying the Chital valley in Pakistan.
Like a bungee jump except that there’s no risk assessment, they do it repeatedly and get paid peanuts. OK, so not much like a bungee jump at all. Check out more here .
We’re going for any drive that involves going over the Millau Viaduct because, well…
Truck driving isn’t always glamorous (understatement) but with views like this as reward, you can see why drivers suffer endless indignities and the drudgery of the M25!
Fastest Haulage Delivery (Virtual)
Do NOT try this at home. Or in the warehouse. Or,… look, just don’t try it.
Stupidest Forklift Driver
Yes, yes, yes – the obligatory forklift fail compilation is a bit of a cliché but a very funny one, nevertheless.
Let’s just say the award is shared by all of them, assuming they can make it to the podium to collect it without careening into a wall.
Another award that, frankly, comes with more nominations than it’s possible to sift through. Here’s a representative sample:
We’re going to opt for this one however, for the laconic disdain shown towards all other humans. A monument to the Darwin Awards principle.
And finally, to prove we’re not complete haters at Zupplychain, we’re going to round off with some truly stunning work .
Hats off, Ladies and Gentlemen, to our 2016 Parking God.
Anything we’ve missed?